Sunday, March 9, 2014

3 & a half years later!

Wow! I had completely forgotten about this blog! I kinda wish I had of kept it up for the whole 12 weeks back then to see the full transformation!
By the time I finished that round of Michelle Bridges 12 week body transformation I had lost 20kgs. I felt wonderful in my new body and couldn't wait to see how I would look after losing another 20! But I slacked off. There was a lot of stress in my life back then, I became homeless - my son and I had to stay in a refuge for a while, then we finally found a house on the other side of the state - hours away from any family & friends. We had to take it - we didn't have a choice. Once we moved into our new home I was still determined to keep this new healthy lifestyle - so I went straight to the local gym and joined up. For a few months it was going OK... I wasn't working out every day like I had been during the 12WBT but the diet was still good so I signed up for the  next round of 12WBT... Then found out I was expecting! I knew I could still do light exercise but by now I had resigned to the fact that I would have to basically start all over again once bub was born. I stupidly kept using my pregnancy as an excuse to eat badly & slowly the exercise stopped all together. 
I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl on February 13th 2012 at 10am by Cesarean. It didn't take long to recover, as I had already had a Cesar with my first born, so I promised myself that as soon as I felt I could I'd start walking every day and build up my fitness slowly. I had put on 8kgs during my pregnancy, but I knew if I could get them off fairly quickly and get back to the weight I was at the end of the 12WBT that it would be easy to get back into the head space I needed to be in to continue my weight loss journey. 
So I found a gorgeous walking track that passed a little pond, & a paddock with horses, & it even had a few grassy hills for Noah to roll down! Everything was going great... Until I woke up one night feeling like something was crushing my rib cage - I thought I was having heart trouble so we rushed up to the hospital. After a few days in there I was told I had an enlarged gall bladder. Apparently this is not a big deal, it's just uncomfortable & should go away on it's own. Fast forward 3 months and I'm back in hospital for the 100th time - this time being prepped for surgery to have my gall bladder removed. By now I had put on another couple of kilos and was 10kgs heavier than I had started out, but weight loss was not on my mind at all - I had endured so much crap over the past year or so, I sank into a depression - It seemed like if it wasn't one thing it was another! First homeless, then having to move away from everyone & everything I had ever known, a miscarriage scare, severe morning sickness that almost landed me in hospital, cholestasis during the pregnancy, breast feeding all but impossible, and now this! 
Things started to look up after the surgery, I felt better within myself and was able to enjoy the new addition to our family for the first time since she was born. We also moved back to the east coast where all our family & friends are so all of our moods lifted quite a bit. 
So now it was the beginning of 2013, Noah was starting 1st grade at a new school, Annabella had just turned 1, and life was good! So I decided NOW is the time that something needs to be done about my weight. I have been struggling for 12 months now trying to get into the right head space that I need to be in - I have tried everything from bringing the Otto bin inside and emptying all the junk out of my cupboards, to joining Michelle Bridges 12WBT again, to buying exercise equipment (that doesn't get used very often)
2013 was another hard year for my family - Noah got bullied severely & My father came to live with us due to not being able to look after himself anymore. It has been a big adjustment living with a parent again, and now I am homeschooling Noah that takes up a lot of my time, but I know that isn't an excuse. Josh and I have decided that May 2015 will be the time we get married so I have a lot of work to do before then. I refuse to even try on a wedding dress until I am weighing in the double digits. I am at my heaviest now at 140kgs. I am ashamed to leave the house most days, I hate this body and the way that I feel in it, so I am determined now.... THIS IS IT. No more excuses! If I don't get healthy I won't be around to see Noah's 18th birthday, or Annabella have children... Heck I may not even be around for my own wedding if I don't get my butt into gear!! WATCH THIS SPACE. "before" pics coming soon.